I should be in bed. I am tired but I am still awake. Sometimes when you are a mom and a wife the only time you have alone is when everyone else is asleep. This is life with kids. Usually Brad and I sit down in the evenings and watch a TV show together just to relax and chill. I might drink a glass of wine or have a margarita. It’s like a parent time-out. We make the kids play outside, quietly on their computer, or in their rooms. Is that mean? I think not. We are both stay-at-home parents and we homeschool our children so we are together all the time. An hour or two of parent time-out in the evenings won’t hurt anyone. If anything it helps Mommy and Daddy stay sane.

I am in love with my kids. I tell my husband, “They are the best gift you have given me.” And it’s true. But sometimes I feel overwhelmed and useless. Like a failure at being a mom. I have all these great ideas and plans for us and our children, and I procrastinate… I think it’s the ADHD that I have struggled with since I was a child. For example, I printed out all the material for a music lapbook and I took it to Belize with us at the end of March. Well, the material came back home with us too. Unused. And it’s June. I swear we are going to put that lapbook together! UPDATE: I ended up tossing it undone when we moved to Uruapan!

I, I, I… me, me, me. What about you? Do you have some of the same feelings as a mom or a wife? I know Brad gets overwhelmed, but for different reasons. He had to go for a walk today to get some fresh air. The boys were fighting or rather, Sawyer was hitting Tristan on the head with a sippy cup and I was completely spaced out, ignoring the whole thing. That’s terrible, isn’t it? I have very good skills at blocking out the world around me and that is not always a good thing. So poor Brad was tired of yelling at the kids to behave, and tired of me being on another planet, so he took a walk. That is when I realized I need to get up and take control of the situation. I had my nose in my laptop, working on making blogger connections, but there were more important things going on around me.

Right now, my beautiful babies are in bed and Brad is snoring away on his sleep apnea machine. Even Cookie, the dog, is asleep under the kid’s bed. The house is quiet and peaceful and I love it. I can think! Even if, I am thinking about the mistakes I made today, as an ADHD, mom of four. I am far from a perfect mom or wife. Maybe I will do better tomorrow. That is always the goal. “Live, laugh, learn, love!”, I always say. Those are four things I know I can do well :-) Signing off and hitting the sack, Tina, the crazy mom of four, living in a madhouse.